Things I am thankful for:
- Fallout 76. Thank you for reminding me that even things that I love will one day disappoint and betray me.
- Donny Cates. For showing that sometimes the best way to create something new is by simply cramming two old things together and going with whatever the result is.
- Netflix. Thanks for doing that jumpscare intro for a month or so around halloween. It’s good to know my heart is still healthy.
- Leftovers. A month from now I will have something to do when I open the fridge, see the dozen or so tupperware and say “oh, ew, we still have leftovers.”
- The 2018 Election. Thank you for showing that we live in a country where a state that is very evenly split between two parties will receive mockery and ire from the rest of the country instead of being praised as a prime example of democracy at work.
- Keyforge. Randomly generate names for decks in an incredibly random card game? Cool idea. Who knew it would be the source of such simplistic comedy.
- Food Network Cooking Challenges. Thank you for the opportunity to sit and be loudly judgmental of someone else’s culinary abilities and choices. It’s the perfect accompaniment to my microwaved Spaghetti-O’s.
- Sony’s Spider-Man. Not really anything funny to say, just thank you. The whimsy and joy this game gave me was remarkable. I felt like I kid again the whole time. I can’t wait to play the DLC.
- My three cats. Honestly, that whole desire to have a clean home was just getting in the way anyway. Good lookin’ out, cats.
- Bradley Cooper. Thank you for making the bar of attractive male so incredibly high. Seriously, I was worried it would be too easy to be considered attractive. Handsome, funny, great beard, Well educated, multi-lingual, talented actor, talented voice actor and, thanks to A Star is Born, musically talented both on an instrument and in voice. Awesome. Thank you SOOOOO much, you ass.
- The Haunting of Hill House. Thank you for bringing the hidden ghost concept to mind so now I can’t watch any show or movie or even walk through my own home without looking for subtle ghosts hiding somewhere.
- White Barn 3-Wick Candles. It’s nice to have an addiction that at least smells good. Still an addiction, though. Seriously. This is a cry for help.
- The people of New Orleans. I thought I knew what drinking was, but you guys showed me there is just like a whole other tier of drinking I didn’t know existed.
And of course, I am thankful for my awesome friends, wonderful family, and my lovely wife. Thank you to all those people for being in my life.
Now I better start cooking or those friends are going to beat me.